The only gift is a portion of thyself.

 – Ralph Waldo Emerson

What does this really mean? And how does it relate to ourselves our marriages, intimate partners, all our relationships with our children, our friends, collegues and to all life?

In simple terms it means to love and accept yourself unconditionally.
Unconditional love seems impossible.  Yet I know it’s not because I am living proof that when you choose to truly get to know who you authentically are and love yourself and all your behaviors then unconditional love is realized.

I was brought up to believe like most of us that taking care of others is the most important thing.

Whether a parent taking care of a child, or a wife or husband taking care of your partner? Or an adult child taking care of an elderly parent. It is automatic for us, we have mostly a deep sense of obligation to take care of other people over ourselves.

Most of us have been brought up to believe that everyone else comes before us.

The concept of self love as it’s so beautifully described in this simple analogy of a flight attendant reminding us in the event of the oxygen mask being required to be used, do not go to put the mask on the person next to you, please place the oxygen mask on yourself first.  Then help the you will have the ability to help the person next to you.  Because if you go to help others first you will run out of oxygen and not be able to help anyone else and you will not survive.

As we take responsibility for filling up our cup then we can give and give and give without it being at the cost to ourselves.

In 1956 psychologist and social philosopher Erich Fromm proposed that loving oneself is different from being arrogant, conceited or egocentric. He proposed that loving oneself means caring about oneself, taking responsibility for oneself, respecting oneself, and knowing oneself (e.g. being realistic and honest about one’s strengths and weaknesses). He proposed, further, that in order to be able to truly love another person, a person needs first to love oneself in this way.

I am inviting you to take the adventure of self love with us, and let’s together reclaim the greatest most sustainable and only true love together.

What’s one baby step in the direction to self love?

Create a list of 10 acts of self love (basically experiences you would love to have, and long to have as gifts to yourself)

Remember our lives on this earth are our own, are experiences are ours, we came in with self and we’ll leave with self…  its up to us to create the experiences we choose to have, no one else can do this for us.

When you Think of the list, consider adding to the list what you have longed to do, like sky dive, or painting, whatever is calling your heart, do it now, make it your number one priority.

Its your time, you are worth it, this is a list of gifts to yourself, you are sooooooooo worthy.

It may be to travel to, or to simply go for a walk, or treat yourself to the spa for a day.  However simple or elaborate it’s time to create space for you.

Ok, as you have embodied one step, lets jump in a little deeper here…

Are you ready, it won’t hurt it will heal…

I am inviting you to go to your bathroom mirror look at yourself in the eyes and repeat after me..

I am here for you, I love every part of you, I forgive you, I honor you for the journey you have been on, I applaud you for the courage you have shown, despite feeling alone and unloved.

You are no longer alone, you are no longer unloved.  I honor you as the most important person I will ever meet.

You are beautiful, you are unique, you are love…

I am inviting you to take the time each morning to repeat this, even when you don’t feel it or believe it.  Especially as you don’t believe it or feel it.

Finally, for this post I would like to invite you to truly give yourself permission to feel, what you honestly feel and then share this truth with yourself and all those whom is relevant.

When we are honest with ourselves about how we feel, we honor ourselves, and we honor others.

This is the the greatest act of self love, being true to thyself.

As “Shakespeare said, “To thy own self be true”

Give yourself the love you seek, and the universe will send people who match it.

 – Abraham-Hicks

Catherina Founder and CEO (Chief Empowerment Officer) of Think Love